nothing tastes as good as john mayer feels ...

I suck at Twitter.

I mostly use it for minor celeb stalking following (when I actually remember I even have a Twitter).

Anyway ... one of my favorite celebs to read updates from is none other than

John Mayer. (@johncmayer)

I really enjoy John's music ... but beyond his incredible musical and lyrical (seriously, GO GET BATTLE STUDIES. NOW.) talents the man is FREAKING HILARIOUS.

Seriously.

Here are a few of my recent favorites -- you'll see, he's a funny guy.

@SkyMall I gave my lawyer the painting of the wolves with inspiring mantra on Leadership. Framed. Cause I'm fancy.

Nobody seems to think a gift certificate for catalogs.com is strange? You might as well say "I"m sure that I know nothing about you."

@taylorswift13 let's bedazzle something!

If you're shocked that Britney was lip-syncing at her concert and want your money back, life may continue to be hard for you.

This is the part in a line of interviews where I want to start making answers up. So if you read that I breed alpacas, go with it.

I'm in Australia on Halloween. It's like turning out your porch light times a billion.

If you want to go out and buy an entire case of AA batteries, I say more power to you.

This unfortunate media display involving balloon boy undermines the hundreds of boys and girls actually lost to balloon flight every year.

All cookies are sugar cookies.

Dove bar soap is 1/4 moisturizer. That's why Dove bar soap is allowed to make moisturizer jokes and you're not.

See?! And seriously. Get Battle Studies. It's GORGEOUS. This song makes my heart smile.

Now I'm going to leave you with one of my favorite Mayer moments.

Mmmmmmmmmm. I think I like it better than the original.

xoxoxo.